Fic Commentary: Miles to Go - One

[wishiknewwho]

The amazing, wonderful, lovely salimali  asked me to do commentary on Miles to Go.  Because I love her (and the rest of you), I said yes.  And no, this is not the surprise that is coming later.

One

You used to think that someone would come along  

and lay beside you in the space that they belonged

“Your New Twin-Sized Bed”

These lyrics are so lonely. I thought they fit Rose perfectly for this story.

 

Rose Tyler passed the warm paper cup of coffee from hand to hand as she watched the children playing inside the fenced-in playground of the school. Most of the boys were involved in a football match that was quickly turning into more of a scuffle. Several girls were clustered around the swings while others sat in a circle, playing one of those complicated hand clap games that she had long forgotten.

I’m still not sure if this opening works. *shrugs*

 

She took a sip of her coffee, letting the warmth of the liquid comfort her. It was almost Autumn and the wind was already biting a little.

 

Her eyes scanned the playground until they landed on the child she was looking for, a little girl sitting alone under the slide. Rose sighed as she watched the girl trace patterns in the dirt, taking no notice of the other children. It had been going on like this for a while, but she had no strategy for stopping it. The teachers signalled the end of playtime, and the children rushed to queue up, pushing at each other and laughing as the teachers strived to get them into some sort of order. The girl walked quietly over to where the others were convening. She stood behind the others. Just as they were about to go inside, she caught sight of Rose, and brightening, she gave her a grin and a wave. Rose waved back and took another sip of her coffee.

 I wanted to demonstrate 2 of Kira’s biggest traits here: she’s something of an outsider, and she her mum is her whole world.

 

Knowing it would be another hour before school let out, Rose wandered into the bookshop across the street from the school. She meandered through the aisles, picking up a book here and there, but nothing looked interesting enough to buy. She pulled out her mobile every few minutes to check the time, ignoring the annoyed stare of the woman who ran the shop. Moments before the bell was supposed to ring, she went back outside to wait on the pavement.

I have no idea what purpose this little scene serves.

 

The doors to the school opened and kids flooded out, streaming off in every direction. She waited patiently as the steady flow turned to stragglers, and finally a little girl walked out, clutching the straps of her rucksack. She made her way to Rose.

 

“Hi, Mum,” she said. “Are you still taking me to get my new shoes?”

 

Rose reached down and pulled her daughter into a quick hug, then moved back so she could have a good look at her. She reached up and tucked the little girl’s errant blonde hair behind her ears. “Didn’t I fix your hair this morning, Kira?”

One thing that came to me early on about Kira is that she has this messy hair. It’s not curly, really...it’s just never tidy.

 

Kira shifted impatiently and grabbed Rose’s hand, tugging her along. “My shoes, Mum.”

 

Rose gave in and laughed. “Okay, okay. Your shoes. I’d just like to see you go one day with your hair in place. Is that too much for a mum to ask?”

 

“It bothers me when it’s all pulled back like that. Besides, Gran says that you were horrid when you were little, much worse than me.” Kira said the word “horrid” slowly, obviously enjoying the taste of the word in her mouth.

A little bit of the Doctor here. Just as he does, Kira enjoys words and they way they sound and feel as you say them. 

 

Rose reached down and gave her nose a tweak. “So, have you given any thought to what kind of shoes you might like?” she asked.

 

Kira walked along, hopping on the balls of her feet one second, switching hands with Rose to walk backwards the next. Rose had long since gotten used to her daughter’s tendency to shift moods, going from solemn to hyper in the blink of an eye. 

Kira is a bit of a handful. She was a clingy baby and she’s grown into a hyperactive, curious little girl. She cannot be still to save her life.

 

“I want trainers,” she said. “Maybe black or maybe red. I’ll know when I see.”

 

“Well then,” Rose said, “that sounds like a plan. Red or black trainers.”

 

“Or both,” Kira added hopefully, looking up at Rose with wide brown eyes.

 

Rose shook her head. “You know I only said one pair. Besides, we have to get you good ones, yeah? The expensive kind like all the other kids wear.”

Rose is young enough to understand that things like this are important. She also likely grew up without the cool shoes, and wants Kira to have them.

 

Kira didn’t say anything to that, just kept on walking.

Kira knows exactly what Rose is getting at. She hates these conversations.

 

“What were you doing under the slide, love?” Rose asked, pulling Kira out of the way as they passed a noisy group of tourists.

 

“Just playing,” Kira mumbled, looking down at her scuffed trainers.

 

“All by yourself?” Rose asked. She didn’t want to press, but this was becoming an issue. The teacher was sending notes home, recommending she see a psychologist. She didn’t want it to come to that. “Why weren’t you with some of those other girls by the swings? Or playing that clap game? I could probably teach you that, if you’re worried about looking silly.”

 

Kira’s hand went limp in hers, but Rose held on. “You could even play with the boys, if you like football better. No one would think that’s weird or anything.”

 

Kira kept walking, but her steps were smaller, evenly spaced. She no longer bounced like she had moments before. “I don’t like them,” she said.

 

“Why not?” Rose asked, pulling her daughter closer to her. She hated to see her like this.

 

“Because they are mean to me. They say I’m strange.” Kira leaned into her mother, resting her head on her arm.

 

Rose stopped in the middle of the road and knelt down in front of her daughter. She took her shoulders in her hands. “You listen to me, Kira Tyler.” She paid no attention to the irritated people who had to step around them. “You are brilliant. And you are a great kid. That makes you special, not strange.”

Rose feels like she’s constantly fighting these battles with her kid. Not only does she have to deal with a difficult child, she has one with little confidence.

 

Kira didn’t say anything, just met her gaze with a steady look of her own. Rose wondered when her daughter had gotten so jaded in her six years of life. She knew that Kira was prone to keep to herself, especially around other children. She had different interests than them: she never wanted to play with dolls or things like that. She preferred to read. And take things apart, like the toaster or the computer, and put them back together.

 

Rose sighed. She didn’t know what she could say to fix it. Kids could be cruel and that was that. There was nothing she could do to change the way other children treated her daughter, and she wasn’t about to ask Kira to change. “You just keep on being so great, but also try to be friendly, yeah?” She looked down at Kira. “I’ll bet there’s at least one kid in your class who is lonely, who’d like to have you for a friend.”

 

Kira just shrugged and kept walking.

 

Rose went on.   “You’d be doing them a favour. And then maybe you’d have someone to help you with your projects. I mean, do you think you can get the fridge apart on your own?”

 

The corners of Kira’s mouth lifted slightly.

 

Rose ruffled her hair, then took her hand back in hers. “That’s a smile. I know it was. You can try to deny it, but I’m an expert on smiles, me. Can spot them a mile away.”

Rose is an expert at getting Kira to smile. There may or may not be something about this in the sequel ;)

 

“Mum,” Kira said, stretching the word into two syllables, but she was grinning widely.

 

Rose looked up. They had made it to the shoe shop. “Come on,” she said. “Let’s see about some shoes.”

 

She and Kira went inside and made their way to the back of the shop to the children’s shoes.

 

“Do you see any you like?” Rose asked, gesturing to the neat rows of shoes before them.

 

Kira’s eyes carefully scanned over the shoes, frowning. “I don’t see the ones I want,” she said, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

 

Rose moved towards the shoes and picked up a pair of gray trainers with little pink stripes. “What about these?” She held the pair up to Kira.

 

She shook her head. “No, those aren’t right. And they’re not even red or black.”

 

Rose put the shoes back and went a little further down the aisle. Her eyes landed on a pair of trainers that were mostly red with just a little bit of white. She picked those up. “These are red. They look very cool.”

 

Kira barely looked at the shoes. “They’re not right either. I know what kind I want and they don’t have them here. Can we go somewhere else?”

 

Rose sighed and put the shoes down. She moved back to Kira and took her hand. “I suppose so. I think there’s another shoe shop a few streets further down.”

Ahem, can you say spoiled?

 

She led Kira out of the shop and back onto the busy street. It would be dark soon, and the temperature would drop. Neither of them was wearing warm jackets.

 

“You’re going to have to either pick something at the next shop or not get anything at all. We can’t wander around all of London for you to find the shoes you have in your mind, love.” She gestured toward Kira’s rucksack. “Do you want me to take that for you? Is it getting heavy?”

 

Kira shook her head. “I’ve seen these shoes lots of times. Even grownups wear them. We’ll find them.”

 

They made their way to the second shoe shop. This one was a little bit larger than the last, and Rose wondered why she didn’t think to come here first.

I have no idea how London is set up. Seriously, I just made this up. The betas didn’t flag it though, so maybe it’s not too bad.

 

As they went inside, the opening of the door ringing a bell, Rose nodded at the clerk at the counter while Kira took off for the children’s shoes.

 

“Wait for me, Kira,” she called but the little girl was already gone. Isn’t it scary when kids run off? Frowning, she followed in the direction Kira had taken off. Just as she reached the end of the aisle Kira came running up, brandishing a pair of high top Converse.

 

“They have them, Mum. These are the ones I want.” Her brown eyes were bright and her cheeks were flushed with excitement.

 

Rose put a steadying hand on the shelf next to her. She felt dizzy and her eyes started to tear up.

Rose always tries to avoid things that remind her of him. Only, she has a huge reminder thatn never lets her forget. She’s fighting a losing battle, but that doesn’t mean she quits trying. She wants desperately to give Kira a good life, and she knows that in order to do that, she’s going to have to get over him.

 

“Can we see if they have my size?” Kira asked, swinging the shoes by the laces.

 

Rose took a deep breath and tried to steady herself. She’d done her best to wipe all memory of him from her life, save for the one she couldn’t, but every now and then, little things like this would pop up to surprise her.

Kira reminds her of him in a million little ways and each and every time it is painful.

 

“Mum?” Kira’s voice shifted from excited to concerned. “Are you all right?” She put her hand on Rose’s arm.

 

At her daughter’s touch, she shook her head and came back to herself. “Yeah, I’m fine. But not those shoes, love. Any shoes but those.” She felt bad telling her no, but she couldn’t bear to have those shoes in her life. The memories would be there every time she looked at her daughter’s feet. Every time she took them off when Kira fell asleep. They’d be lying around the house just waiting for her to trip over them.

I’ve never been quite sure about this paragraph. Part of me can see its value, but part of me feels there’s something off about it.

 

“Why not?” Now Kira’s eyes were filling with tears. She squared her shoulders, obviously ready to fight for the shoes.

 

“Because I said so.” Rose had never wanted to be that parent, the one who made her child do things without giving her an explanation, but she wasn’t about to tell Kira why she couldn’t have the shoes.

 

“That’s not a reason,” Kira said, stamping her foot. It wasn’t very loud, as the floor in the shop was carpeted, but for a child whose temper flared very rarely, it did make an impact.

 

Rose reached down and took the shoes from Kira, prising her fingers off of them one by one until she had gotten them away from her. Kira dropped to the floor once the shoes were out of her hands. Rose felt awful. “Not those shoes,” she said again.

I felt awful for Kira at this moment. And for Rose as well; she’s being kind of mean here, but she hates doing it.

 

Kira looked up at her with hurt eyes. “I hate you,” she said, tears streaming down her cheeks.

We see this from Kira a couple of times in this story. She gets upset, her temper flares, and she lashes out at Rose. I told my mom I hated her once when I was little, and I’ve regretted it my entire life.

 

Rose put the shoes back in their place, trying to hold back her own tears. She knew that was all part of being a mother, having to do things her daughter wouldn’t like or agree with it, but she never knew it would hurt so much, even when she knew Kira didn’t mean it. 

This sentence still bugs me, because this isn’t one of those things Rose “has” to do. It’s not like she’s enforcing bedtime or saying no to sweets before dinner. *shrugs*

 

She made her way back to her daughter and knelt down in front of her. “Would you like to find some other shoes?”

 

Kira just shook her head and refused to look at her.

 

Rose brushed a couple of her own tears away with the back of her hand. “All right, then. We need to go and get some dinner and go home.”

This whole scene was so clear in my mind. I sat down and started writing, and this chapter came out in about two sittings. I had no idea where it was going, but this first chapter just flowed so well. Kira literally leaped off the page. I did no work on her character at all.

 

Kira just shook her head again. Evidently she was on the carpet for the long haul.

I like this last sentence. It’s concise and I like the words and rhythm. *pats self on back*

 

Rose felt the eyes of the other customers on her; they had to get out of there, quickly, before the entire shop knew what a horrible parent she was. She reached down and hauled Kira to her feet, but still the little girl refused to budge.

Has anyone else tried to pick up a child that doesn’t want to be picked up? They somehow manage to defy the laws of physics.

 

“I want the shoes,” she said, her voice quiet, but demanding. Something about her tone sent a chill down Rose’s spine. She’d heard someone talk like that once, ages ago now.

I can just imagine Kira saying this in the Doctor’s tone.

 

She wasn’t about to drag her out of the store and cause even more of a scene. Instead, she lifted her up, backpack and all, settled her on her hip and took her outside. Kira was so surprised she didn’t say a word, didn’t even try to fight her.

Rose totes Kira around quite a bit in these stories. Maybe that’s strange, with her being six. But Kira is quite small and both of them are clingy to each other, so it makes sense. Besides, I’m smaller than Rose and I’ve carried a 5 ½ year old from one side of Disney World to the other. If I can do it, so can she.

 

Once out in the street, Rose turned her head to Kira who was crying quietly. “Do you want to walk or shall I carry you?”

 

Kira didn’t answer, so Rose kept her in her arms and they headed down the street. 

 

“Would you rather Chinese or pizza tonight? Or we could get fish and chips, if you like, even though we did have that yesterday.” Rose tried to inject a cheerful note in her voice, although she felt anything but.

 

Kira kept her eyes fixed on the street before her.

 

“Perhaps it’s best we just head home.” Rose tried to walk faster. Kira was growing heavy, but she wasn’t about to put her down. It was too crowded and if she tried to run, she’d never catch her. “I’ll make you some cereal if you get hungry, yeah?”

I can just imagine Rose’s fear of Kira running. She’s always been a difficult child, but she’s never been this angry. Rose doesn’t know what to expect from her.

 

She tried to carry on like nothing was wrong, but it was difficult with a sullen child who had every right to be sullen. Why couldn’t she have just gotten over it and gotten her the shoes?

 

Because it’s too much like him, the little voice in her head insisted.

Ugh, I hate seeing this. I don’t like doing thoughts.

 

Once they reached their building, she waited for the lift. Kira’s head rested against her shoulder, all the fight drained out of her. Rose slipped her hand under Kira’s rucksack and rubbed her back for a moment, promising herself that she would do something to make it up to her. She had the day off from work Saturday. Maybe they’d spend the day doing anything Kira wanted to do, the museum, the zoo, the library, whatever caught her fancy.

I love this moment between them. One of the defining moments of the Kira/Rose dynamic. I love the way Kira is seeking comfort from Rose even as she’s so angry with her and the way Rose is comforting Kira and thinking up of ways to make it up to her. Possibly my favourite scene in this chapter and one of my favourites overall.

 

Outside their door, Rose sat her down so that she could get the keys out of her bag. As soon as she got the door open, Kira tore off to her room and, seconds later, Rose heard the door slam shut. She decided to leave her to herself for a while, give her some time to cool down.

And the comforting moment is over.

 

Rose made her way into the flat, setting her bag down and checking the messages. Nothing exciting, just one of the girls from work calling to say she wouldn’t be able to come in tomorrow. She loaded their breakfast dishes into the dishwasher and wiped down the counter. She tidied the living room, then got her things and Kira’s together to do a load of laundry. She knew that if she stopped doing something, she’d break down. At least the flat was getting a much-needed straightening, and if she was lucky, she’d wear herself out too much to be upset.

Once again we have Rose piddling around the flat while she’s upset. I don’t do this. I don’t know why I make Rose do it. Hmm.

 

Every so often, she paused by Kira’s door and listened. She could hear her moving around in there, the sound of pages in a book being turned one time, the sound of metal on metal the next. She was likely tinkering with one of her many little appliances that Rose had bought her second-hand just for this purpose.

 

When she checked after they’d been home for an hour, she heard no sound at all coming from inside the room. Easing the door open, she poked her head in. Kira was asleep on the bed, book still clutched in her hand, one of her legs hanging off the side of the bed.

 

Rose tiptoed across the room, carefully slid the book from her fingers, and adjusted her so that she was lying on the bed. She took off Kira’s ratty trainers, and looking at the little pink and white shoes, dirty and scuffed and not at all what her daughter wanted, she realised how awful she’d truly been. She couldn’t believe she’d denied her daughter something she wanted so badly for her own selfish reasons. So the shoes reminded her of him. Anything reminded her of him, if she was in the right mood for it.

 

Sitting down next to Kira on the bed, she smoothed the hair back from her face. “We will get you those trainers tomorrow,” she whispered. “I promise.”

Thank the mister for this. I wasn’t going to let her have the shoes, but when I read this chapter to him, he said that Kira had to have her shoes. Otherwise he’d never forgive Rose. And I realised he was right. Thanks to him, we get this sweet, sad little scene.

 

She went back to the living room and pulled out her laptop to do some work. She wasn’t sure how long she sat there, but her eyes were growing fuzzy and she was near to dozing when the sound of footsteps woke her back up. She sat her laptop on the coffee table and looked up to see Kira standing in the doorway to the living room, wiping her eyes. She was still in her school uniform, her tights baggy at the knees.

 

“Mummy?” Kira asked, her voice trembling. She looked frightened and confused. She never fell asleep that early in the evening and certainly not without her dinner.

I hate falling asleep early in the evening. And poor Kira, she’s hungry and confused.

 

Rose held out her arms to her. “Come here, love.” Kira rushed over to her and Rose was grateful at her daughter’s capacity to forgive. As soon as she was close enough for her to reach, Rose pulled her into her lap and hugged her as tightly as she could. Kira’s body was warm with sleep and she smelled faintly of outside and school and that indefinable smell that used to remind her of him, but now only carried with it the fond familiarity of her daughter.

My other favourite moment of this chapter. There’s something so comforting about Kira and Rose to me. I love how much they cling to one another.

 

Kira pressed her face into Rose’s neck and cried, and Rose held her for a few moments, remembering times from her own childhood when it seemed like her mother could fix everything.

Remember how refreshing it felt to cry when you were little, to let everything out and start new?

 

Once Kira had calmed down, Rose moved her back a little so that she could see her face. She reached up and gently wiped the tears from her cheeks with her thumbs. Rose uses this same gesture on the Doctor near the end of the fic. I always have this family mimic the same actions with one another. It’s part of how they show their love. “I’m sorry. We’ll go back and get you the trainers tomorrow. Any ones you like.”

 

Kira took in a shuddering breath and traced her fingers over the buttons on Rose’s shirt. “Why didn’t you want me to have them?”

 

Rose combed her fingers through Kira’s hair, trying to get the unruly mess to lie flat. “They reminded me of someone from long ago, someone who hurt me. But I’m better now.” They never brought up Kira’s father, not really. Kira knew she’d had one, at some point, but she knew that he was gone now and Rose didn’t like to talk about him. After a long string of questions that had yielded no answers at the age of four, Kira had given up on asking about him.

One day I intend to write this ficlet. In fact, I think I owe it to someone. Possibly <lj user=nylana>

 

Kira shook her head and a look of defiance crept up in her eyes. “Then I don’t want them, if they make you think about someone who was mean to you.”

How great is this kid?

 

Rose laughed and pressed a kiss to her daughter’s forehead. “Oh, love. You’re worth everything and more. But I want you to have those shoes. You’ve been thinking about them a long time now, haven’t you?”

 

“Yes,” Kira said. “I’ve been dreaming of those shoes.”

This is not Kira’s Time Lord senses or anything like that coming out. At least I don’t think it is.

 

Rose frowned. “You have?” She looked at Kira carefully.

 

Kira nodded.  “Yes. I see myself wearing those shoes, and another pair that are much bigger than mine. But I never see who’s wearing them.”

 

Rose took a couple of deep breaths, willing her heart to slow down. It was just a dream, nothing else. It meant nothing. When she had calmed down, Rose grabbed both of her hands in hers. “We are getting you those shoes tomorrow. No use arguing about it.”

 

Kira smiled and Rose knew they were all right. “I don’t hate you,” she said, quietly, as if she just remembered what she had said.

 

“Of course you don’t, love,” Rose said, but inside she felt better at hearing her say it. She cuddled Kira closer to her. “We all say things we don’t mean when we get angry, and you had a right to be angry.”

 

They sat in silence for a few moments, both of them happy for the fight to be over. They didn’t fight often, and usually it was never a major row, nothing near what this one had been. Finally, Rose checked the clock on the telly. It was past nine.

I admit it. I was a little excited to use the word ‘row.’

 

“Are you hungry?” she asked, only just remembering that they hadn’t had dinner.

 

“Starving,” Kira claimed, scrambling off of her lap. “Do we have anything better than cereal?”

I love that Kira remembers this. Kids have this strange ability to remember the most random stuff.

 

Rose got up and followed her into the kitchen. “I think we have a frozen pizza. Is that all right?”

 

Kira nodded. She climbed up on the barstool and propped her elbows on the counter. “Mum?” she asked as Rose took the pizza from the freezer.

 

“Yes?” Rose adjusted the temperature on the oven and turned it on. Too hungry to wait, she removed the pizza from its packaging and slid in into the oven without waiting for it to preheat.

We never wait for the oven to preheat unless it’s something like a cake or cookies.

 

“Who was the person?” Kira swung her legs, kicking them against the cabinets beneath the counter. “The one who wore shoes like mine. Who made you sad.”

 

Rose stopped, empty pizza box dangling from her hand. She watched her daughter for a moment, golden brown eyes looking into chocolate brown, and she knew that her daughter knew. Kira knew that there was a dad out there, somewhere, and for whatever reason he wasn’t with them and that made her mum sad. It was a good opening for Rose to start the conversation she needed to have with her daughter, the one that Jackie kept urging her to address, the sooner the better. 

Rose has no clue how to broach this subject with Kira. She’s afraid she will break down and make things worse than they are.

 

However, just thinking of him made her throat hurt with holding back the tears. No, it was too soon, at least for her. It could wait a little while longer.

 

“Just someone I thought I knew, a very long time ago. But I didn’t know him at all. He’s gone now, and I’ve forgotten.” She threw the box in the bin and hoped that Kira didn’t pick up on the bitterness in her voice.

This is where the chapter originally ended, but I felt it needed a little something extra.

 

Fortunately, Kira began talking about an art project she had done that day at school and they fell into their usual evening routine, only a few hours later. After eating dinner, they watched telly on the sofa. It didn’t take long before Kira had slumped against Rose, fast asleep. Rose let her lie there for a bit, just enjoying her comforting weight against her arm. Then she eased her up and carried her to her bedroom, waking her so that she could get in her jimjams. She tucked her under the covers and kissed her forehead. “Goodnight, love,” she whispered, as Kira drifted back to sleep.

 

Feeling drained herself, Rose went to her own room and got ready for bed. It had been a long day, one that carried more memories of him than usual. It had been years now, and she’d done everything she could to move on, to accept her life for what it was, and be happy. And she was happy, in a way. She had Kira, and she wouldn’t trade her for anything, not even a man in a blue box who had shown her the universe. Yet, she still couldn’t help the lonely tears that came as she slid into the empty bed and curved her body around the space where he should have been.

This is one of the few times that I directly tied the song lyrics into the story. But this image fit so well.

 

This chapter led to something of a frenzy as I spit out chapters faster than anything. This story took over my life for an entire semester and I am grateful to it for keeping me sane.

 

Questions? Comments? Rants? Leave them below.

Comments

[salimali.livejournal.com]

Oh you are so kind :D Thank you x

I have no idea what purpose this little scene serves.
I think it serves the purpose of showing how worried and concerned Rose is with Kira's behaviour in school.

Kira is a bit of a handful. She was a clingy baby and she’s grown into a hyperactive, curious little girl. She cannot be still to save her life.
I know someone like that ;)

Rose is an expert at getting Kira to smile. There may or may not be something about this in the sequel ;)
Sequel Tease alert!!


I have no idea how London is set up. Seriously, I just made this up. The betas didn’t flag it though, so maybe it’s not too bad.
nope nothing wrong with this at all


Kira reminds her of him in a million little ways and each and every time it is painful.
*hugs Rose* Its funny because when I first read this I was so angry with the Doctor, but as the fic continued I changed my perception, I spent most of my time on Beta comments writing, *hugs Rose * or *hugs the Doctor* because really they were both hurting so much

Rose totes Kira around quite a bit in these stories.
I think I commented on this in beta comments, but then as its gone on, I've always thought of it as a comfort thing- hanging on to her being a baby, especially by the Doctor, because he missed the baby years

Thank the mister for this. I wasn’t going to let her have the shoes, but when I read this chapter to him, he said that Kira had to have her shoes. Otherwise he’d never forgive Rose. And I realised he was right. Thanks to him, we get this sweet, sad little scene.
Thank you Mr Wishiknewwho

Once again we have Rose piddling around the flat while she’s upset. I don’t do this. I don’t know why I make Rose do it. Hmm.
I think because if you had her sitting on the sofa doing nothing, it would make explaining her thoughts and feelings quite hard.

This chapter led to something of a frenzy as I spit out chapters faster than anything. This story took over my life for an entire semester and I am grateful to it for keeping me sane.
And are we glad for it (I think the cattle prod might have had something to do with it ;) )

Maybe I need to get the cattle prod out for the sequel eh?

[wishiknewwho.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the long reply. I love your little insights. Sometimes I think you know me better than I know myself. ;)

And yeah, yeah. I'm going to get back to the sequel one of these days. I just have too many birthday fics to write.

[rowofstars.livejournal.com]

One day I intend to write this ficlet. In fact, I think I owe it to someone.
You know I had actually forgotten about this! How terrible is that? :(

Rose combed her fingers through Kira’s hair, trying to get the unruly mess to lie flat. “They reminded me of someone from long ago, someone who hurt me. But I’m better now.”
This paragraph is where I started to hate the Doctor. I was sure he had done something stupid and terrible, and like Rose I laid a lot of blame at his feet. Fortunately, that all changed pretty quickly and like salimali I just wanted to hug them both.

I love reading your thoughts and comments. As I re-read the story it gives these little moments so much more depth and meaning.

[wishiknewwho.livejournal.com]

I think we all experienced that at some point. I had a little hate for the Doctor when I started to write this. But then when I wrote him, he came across as so sad and lonely that I couldn't hate him.

I'm so glad you're enjoying the commentaries. I'm enjoying writing them as well. :D

[wiggiemomsi.livejournal.com]

I love the commentary; thank you so much! It's very helpful to read the thinking that went into what the characters did, and why. This story has been wonderful to read!

*Hugs*

[wishiknewwho.livejournal.com]

Aw, I'm so glad you like it! Thank you!

*hugs*

[abbieelove.livejournal.com]

:D:D I love the commentaries!! ( Especially Miles to Go ones!) I remember reading this and falling in love with Kira straight away :D I can't remember thinking, where are you Doctor! It's so interesting to read what was going on in your mind, it's like reading it for the first time all over again :D

Rose is an expert at getting Kira to smile. There may or may not be something about this in the sequel ;) Spoiler!! Squeee. I loved that bit in this one, "I'm an expert on smiles," It's something a great Mum like Rose would say :D

Thank the mister for this. I wasn’t going to let her have the shoes, but when I read this chapter to him, he said that Kira had to have her shoes. Otherwise he’d never forgive Rose. And I realised he was right. Thanks to him, we get this sweet, sad little scene. Thank you Mr. Wishiknewwho! I think he was right, it proved out Rose is pretty much selfless when it comes to Kira.

I can't wait for Chaper 2 :D:D:D:D

[wishiknewwho.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad you are enjoying these. I always worry I'm wasting people's time. :)

And I agree, I think that Rose buying the shoes added so much more to the story. I don't think anyone would've forgiven her if she hadn't.

[hazelwho.livejournal.com]

Yay! I'm unbelievably excited you're doing a full MtG commentary and I can't wait to read the rest.

Has anyone else tried to pick up a child that doesn’t want to be picked up? They somehow manage to defy the laws of physics.
This had me laughing out loud. How can something that weighs less than 40 pounds do that??

And thanks to Mr Wishiknewwho, because I'm really glad Kira got the shoes. I understand Rose's reaction, but the image of two sets of Chucks side by side is so right for this story.

[wishiknewwho.livejournal.com]

I totally agree with you on that image.

And I'm so glad you agree with me on little kids and the laws of nature. It's weird.